Foster The Hits. And The Wonders.

I have a friend who loves Foster The People. He loves them like This Guy loves This Band.  Were he to be trapped on a desert island, he would bring the single “Pumped Up Kicks” on vinyl, and nothing else, even if he were allowed 5 complete albums.  What I’m saying is, some people seem to love this band.

This morning I came across a post on Stereogum which shows them performing another song, other than “Pumped Up Kicks”.  Honestly, I watched it twice and can’t remember a single thing about it, other than the fact that the singer seems to remind me of a ferret, and has this foot dance thing happening that makes me want to roll a full barrel of pickles in his direction.

Vinnie_the_Ferret_in_a_War_Dance_Jump-300x245

Sure, “Pumped Up Kicks” is a very catchy tune.  Its unstoppable.  But does anyone truly believe this band will be anything beyond a one hit wonder?  Do people even use that term anymore in this one track at a time world?  Does that make me sound old?  Will I have to face mortality?  Am I having a mid life crisis?  All of these answers may be yes, still others may be no.  What do you want from me, you don’t come here for answers.

It’s no secret that my guilty pleasure in life is watching various morning TV shows.  In my former life a TV was nowhere in sight, but for some reason, I find them comforting.  The pointless chatter, combined with false enthusiasm, and occasional combination of hilarious wild animals is just a great way to start the day.  Besides this, these shows are a breeding ground for bands you will never hear from 5 minutes after their segment airs.

As previously mentioned, LMFAO seems to be all over that shit.  Still, after knowing exactly what the performers look like and hearing their song several times, I could not at all tell you how it sounds.  Any combination of a few good looking people wearing in ear monitors and performing to back up tracks…I have no fucking idea what these groups sound like.  These performers are like the water droplets on a frying pan.

Is this just another step on the road to musical cynicism?  Probably.  But then someone like Reggie Watts comes along and blows your brain right out of its custom molded iPad style flip casing:

So we really can’t be sure. Until then, you better run better runnnn and all of that.

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